Family
by Metajoker
Summary: A must read for all Tasuki's fans out there!Seriously!It gives you a preview of his family!What are they like? RnR!!!ALL Tasuki fans MUST read!


**Family**  
  
"Shun'u!!! BAKA!!! COME HERE, OOIIIII!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"  
  
Shun'u ran out of the house. He was trying to escape his sisters. Some sisters they were. Weren't older sisters suppose to look after the younger ones?! Shun'u could not help thinking that the so called legend of Suzaku helping his people wasn't true.  
  
He ducked as a wooden chair sailed over his head.  
  
_CRASH!!!_  
  
The wooden chair broke into pieces as it smashed against the wall.  
  
"Hey if you called yourself a woman you should be doing that!!!!" Shun'u yelled over his shoulder.  
  
"Say that AGAIN and I swear I'll kill you!!!!!!" screeched the youngest of the five sisters.  
  
The eldest daughter was already married with four kids of her own. Unfortunately, her husband passsed away two months ago. She visited her parents thrice a week. Her visiting also meant extra 'valuable' time with her so- called best youngest brother in the whole world. The eldest could ONLY get angry at Tasuki and no one else. Strange and unfair.  
  
The second daughter was also a red head like Tasuki. Her hair was a very deep orange, almost like red.She was married off to a wealthy merchant and visited her parents twice a week. She had a pair of twins, who kept on pestering Uncle Shun'u. She visited her parents, not because she wanted to see her parents but it was to bring her irritating twins to irritate their uncle. She loved making fun of Tasuki. Among the five sisters, she had the most nicknames for him, ranging from 'Over Grown Skunk' to 'The Shittiest brother in the whole entire Universe'.  
  
The third was married off to a scholar. With only one daughter, who, had picked up her temper, visited only once a week. She was the most violent among the sisters. Ever since she moved out, Tasuki couldn't help celebrating. Heaven at last! No more broken furniture or plates. No more major injuries for him! Sigh... If only life could listen to Tasuki, he would make sure that he would never have to see his sisters again.  
  
The fourth sister, was also a red head. Unlike Tasuki's hair which looked like fire, her hair colour was lighter. The fourth married a farmer and was expecting. She was the most strongest among the five. She could lift up Tasuki like as if he was a piece of paper. She didn't have biceps or muscles therefore, making it hard to believe that she was REALLY strong. She would toss him about like a rag doll. Among the five, she was the second scariest.  
  
The most scariest you ask? Isn't it obvious?  
  
With all the characteristics of the four oldest sisters..... That's right, the youngest sister.  
  
She gets angry at Tasuki ONLY. She has an even fouler mouth than the second daughter. Very violent and tomboyish. Very, very strong. What could be worse? No, it doesn't stop here. She was the most mischievous among the five. And no, she wasn't married. She was still a single brunette who tied up her hair in two buns at the side of her head. Scary.  
  
But wait...  
  
Here comes another female who was the worst and the scariest among the family members.  
  
You can't guess?  
  
Seriously?  
  
Are you sure?  
  
Here's a hint...  
  
She is even older than the oldest daughter.  
  
Still can't get it right?  
  
I pity you...  
  
Here, I'll tell you the answer to save you from the shock. Who else than his....  
  
Mother.  
  
Mother? Why an old lady you ask?  
  
Among all the females he had seen, she had the BIGGEST BREASTS. And when I say big, I mean really BIG. Big as in ENORMOUS. Her dresses were always very low cut. Very, very low. She never bothered to stop his sisters when they pounced on him. She would just tend to his injuries after they were done with him. After that, she would hug him. And when she did that, she always press, push, shove his face to her chest. He would always suffocate when his face gets stuck in between her breast. Motherly love she would often say. As if...  
  
Worse, her breast where always shaking whenever she moved. Shake, boing, boing, shake..  
  
_Shake, boing..._  
  
Alright, enough of that already.  
  
But, the worst thing that she ever did to him was...  
  
You've guessed it already?  
  
No?  
  
It is very, very, very obvious.  
  
What is the only liquid that Tasuki is allergic to?  
  
That's right.  
  
Milk.  
  
A mother's milk.  
  
To be more specific, his mother's milk. You know, the milk that comes out of the breast?  
  
He always suffocated when she breast feed him. He could not drink. How can you drink when you can't breathe?  
  
Forget it...  
  
Let us not mention anymore of this nonsense about his mother having big breast and about breast feeding before the boys out there get dirty ideas or their hormones start kicking....  
  
What?  
  
I've left out who?  
  
Oh, his father.  
  
The skinny man who is probably rated the luckiest man in the village. A scholar, a merchant and a farmer as sons -in-law. And five beautiful daughters and a healthy energetic son.  
  
Seven grandchildren and more are on their way. How sweet.  
  
Not to mention...  
  
Do I really have to say this?  
  
Oh all right...  
  
And a _BIG_ breasted woman to call wife.  
  
After his marriage to her, he rarely went out of the house.  
  
Why?  
  
He was... Embarrassed. Having a big breasted woman as a wife wasn't easy. Every time he went out with her to the market, men always ogled at her chest.  
  
_Boing, boing, shake, boing, shake..._  
  
It didn't stop there. All his friends constantly teased him about his wife. He couldn't take it so, he decided to stay at home. Poor guy. Embarrassed for the rest of his life.  
  
I pity him.  
  
So there you have it, an introduction to Tasuki's unique family. Gee, don't you wish you had his family?  
  
"KOU SHUN'U!!! DON'T TRY TO RUN AWAY FROM ME YOU OVER GROWN LAZY BARBARIC BLOOD SUCKING LEECH!!!!!!!"  
  
Or then again, you might want to reconsider...  
  
Here, I'll end my story about Tasuki's family.  
  
_Shake, boing, boing, boing, shake, boing..._  
  
Stop it!!!

* * *

Disclaimer: I never, couldn't, wouldn't, can't, won't own Fushigi Yuugi. Stay tune for the sequel coming up, the story of Tasuki's secret best friend. It will take a while to get the inspiration but I assure you that it will come out as soon as possible.  
  
Sneak preview of my next story: Tasuki always said that he hated woman. Is this true? Or is it a lie to cover up a secret Tasuki had always kept? Who is this mysterious best friend of his? No, not Kouji.. It's a... A girl?!


End file.
